I just cant stop thinking when I keep telling myself to.
I refuse to admit it.
I refuse to take the step.
I mean it's not like I never try.
But it doesn't come back the way I wanted it.
Guess it's better this way now.

I distracted myself with other possible chances.
But it just reverts back.

At times I thought of going into it and see how it is like.
But I refrain myself for doing illegal stuffs.
And I know I shouldn't, I cannot.
But I can't stop thinking how it's like over at that end!
Was so much more fortunate...