me.myself.i

Do i want to know?

2011-02-22T11:36:00.001+08:00

It's all made up words.
It wasn't the same as before.
Everything disappeared in one night.
And it was the limit.
I've decided to make a closure on my side.

It's the ups and downs.
It's like it's not here not there.
It's confusion.
What do you really want?!
Just say it.

Else, fuck off you bitch!

Left me unfinished.

2011-02-20T01:33:00.001+08:00

Yeah.. U're right..
Slowly but surely..
And it's time to stop this..
I Duno what Is happening..

Don't wanna know..
Don't wanna care..

2011-02-14T11:04:00.002+08:00

It's valentine's day today!
Happy v day to all!
May the sweet become sweeter!

Come to think of it, I only remember one v day I had..
The rest was just, wait, were there even any??
Haha.
Was talking to ruby about those stories.
Sounds so sweet now.. Haha!

Some say v day is also a friendship day.
So, why not take this chance?
Happy v day my dear friends!!!
Love you peeps to max and forever!

Yes i have.

2011-01-30T02:09:00.001+08:00

Don't test my limits.
Don't.

The leap..

2011-01-13T23:20:00.001+08:00

I just cant stop thinking when I keep telling myself to.
I refuse to admit it.
I refuse to take the step.
I mean it's not like I never try.
But it doesn't come back the way I wanted it.
Guess it's better this way now.

I distracted myself with other possible chances.
But it just reverts back.

At times I thought of going into it and see how it is like.
But I refrain myself for doing illegal stuffs.
And I know I shouldn't, I cannot.
But I can't stop thinking how it's like over at that end!
Was so much more fortunate...

A different start!

2011-01-06T00:52:00.001+08:00

Time is passing.
Age is running.
But everyday is the same.
It's like such a waste.

So I agreed to every open door.
And let the light shine through.
Let myself experience different routes.
Dare to take.
Dare to lose.

Two days aftet xmas.

2010-12-27T01:09:00.001+08:00

It's heartache.
Couldn't cry.
Couldn't stop thinking.
I liked u so much.
I gave in my all.
I put all effort.
And realize everything was planned out to be a cheat.
U know how much it hurts?
to believe someone would change.
To trust someone thy much.
It just takes a little more.
All u have done was to test me.
But never did u realise that u have been lying to urself.
U clearly know what u want.
Yet u held on to something u never wanted.
And then, finally, hurt this person u never meant to.

Day 1

2010-12-23T19:00:00.001+08:00

Yeah. It's final.
It's the end.
It's goodbye.
And that night was our last night.
The night I got to know who else u have been talking to without me knowing.
Seriously, if I wasn't curious of anything U're doing, would u even bother to inform and share with me?
Many advise never to enter a secret r/s and yes, I've learnt my lesson.

thanks.
Maybe this is a good start.
A new year, a new beginning.
A new life..

The last episode

2010-12-22T22:24:00.001+08:00

You should know why. But u don't. So many things are missing. I trust u. Yes I do. And all I needed was care and respect. At least have the courtesy to ask. This is a r/s. Not a one man show. If alone is what u are feeling and thinking then maybe it's better for u.
No effort no security. No love no feelings. No care no respect. Only honesty.. And I believe honesty is not at It's max. So many things that im kept from. U just feel like a stranger to me. Hi stranger. hi friend.
And the fact is ya, I'm not special. Yes I'm not comfortable. Well, I'm just not the one U're looking for. So why waste each other's time?
Because I know I deserve better.
Because I know I'm worth much much more elsewhere.
And because I know u dun even have the basic courtesy to care for my feelings and show some respect.. A r/s is what we call mutual.

Fuck

2010-12-22T16:22:00.001+08:00

I can't complain I can't complain I can't complain. It's negative enough already.. Stop stop stop

sometimes, five minutes is enough.

2010-12-20T22:24:00.001+08:00

just wanted to know more about today.
a five minutes will be satisfying.
a five minutes will be great.
but just that five minutes is not granted.
goodnight.

...

2010-12-12T20:20:00.001+08:00

Useless useless useless..

If silence is ur middle name.

2010-12-11T11:42:00.001+08:00

Is it that u have nothing to say or just nothing to say to me..
Seriously, if silence is the future, I dun see where I'm standing..

I see myself laugh at jokes made for me.
I see myself share stories and listening to shared stories.
I see myself having power in what I say.
I see myself smile at telephones.
I see no communication breakdown.

But, who is it I saw?

Mm

2010-12-09T01:30:00.001+08:00

Seems like things are changing.
The kisses in those msges are getting to it's minimum.
The talks are getting shorter that u have to say we ran outa topics.
The frequency of quarrels are getting higher.

But I'm happy that you are wanting and missing me more.
Wanting to know where I went, who I'm with, when I'm free is something that u dun use to want in the past.

And sweety, I'm missing u..

The ways.

2010-11-26T01:50:00.001+08:00

The way you wanted to piggy back me
The way you block the muddy water out for me
The way you look when you sleep
The way you kiss me goodbye..
I just love the ways..

Cast aside.

2010-11-23T15:11:00.002+08:00

Seriously, tell me, what's the point of including someone in your life when that person ain't willing to involve you in any of theirs?

So why try so hard?
Just sit back and relax.
And enjoy this solo ride.

I'm definitely going to make this solo ride a wonderful one!
Christmas party!!
New year countdown!!
I love all my friends...

only girl

2010-11-16T15:11:00.001+08:00

I want you to love me, like I'm a hot ride
Be thinkin' of me, doin' what you like
So boy forget about the world cuz it's gon' be me and you tonight
I wanna make your beg for it, then imma make you swallow your pride

Want you to make me feel like I'm the only girl in the world
Like I'm the only one that you'll ever love
Like I'm the only one who knows your heart
Only girl in the world...
Like I'm the only one that's in command
Cuz I'm the only one who understands how to make you feel like a man, yeah
Want you to make me feel like I'm the only girl in the world
Like I'm the only one that you'll ever love
Like I'm the only one who knows your heart
Only one...

Want you to take it like a thief in the night
Hold me like a pillow, make me feel right
Baby I'll tell you all my secrets that I'm keepin', you can come inside
And when you enter, you ain't leavin', be my prisoner for the night, oh

missing you..

2010-10-12T22:27:00.002+08:00

it feels a little weird..
feels like something's missing when you're not here.

please don't.

2010-10-03T22:53:00.002+08:00

Some effort would be nice.
some consideration will be good.
if only . know how it feels.
it was near the bottom the other time.
now, it's just going deeper again.

i'm trying to bring it up.
away from the wound.

What kind of person am I?

2010-09-25T12:17:00.002+08:00

You are an outgoing and cheerful person. Although you get frustrated sometimes, you get through hard times easily and are joyful again.

Your friendly personality makes you attractive in the eyes of the opposite sex, but this makes your spouse feel insecure. Your lack of emotion is a disadvantage, but your honesty/truthfulness has made you popular.

Conclusion:
Friends of your gender find it hard to understand you.
You have an innocent thinking.
But it attracts members of the opposite sex.

ouch.

2010-09-24T19:19:00.001+08:00

Knocked onto.
Rushed into.
And got hurt.

.

2010-09-23T15:10:00.002+08:00

looking at the times when days were nice, msges were sweet.
i just can't stop thinking.
can't stop worrying.
until i hear, i see, i feel.
i'm really missing and thinking of you so much.
please...
let me know you're fine.

be strong.

2010-09-21T07:01:00.002+08:00

it's a busy month.
days are hard.
but i will try my very best to be there for you.
meanwhile, please take care of yourself when i'm not there.
please drink more water and have have some rest whenever you can.
you need to stay strong, healthy and energised.
i'll do my part to be there for you whenever i can..

i'm missing you so much.
and i love you.

DEAR STEPHYY

2010-09-13T11:20:00.003+08:00

Sat night was a BLAST!!
macdonald's and m hotel!
WOOHOOO!!
a perfect night when the night ends with everyone, EVERYONE other than me, high and drunk!!
HAHA~!
let's do it again for yue's birthday!!
WAHAHAHA!

and my birhday in one month's time!
OH MY!
can't wait!
the pool the pool!!
=D
people, don't come early to disturb ok!
LOL!

i want to wish steph a HAPPY HAPPY AWESOME 21st BIRTHDAY!
and your life will continue to be wonderful, because i'm in it!
I promise you.
=)
Thanks darling, for telling me the facts, for helping me to see light in the darkness.
i'm really glad and i've never regretted knowing you!
do you know how impt you are to me?
it's for me to know and for you to find out...
you have a lifetime to find it out alright.
so i'll be in your life forever...

i'm happy just like this.

2010-09-07T16:23:00.002+08:00

baby, i love you from
the way you smile at me,
to the way you look at me,
to the way you behave like a child,
to the way you think i'm funny.

i love you just the way you are.
you are so amazing.

busier and busier.

2010-09-07T03:21:00.002+08:00

finally i finished my final essay for assignment 1.
and without the help of SLSP, i really think i would go out of point, be over the limit of words and fail terribly in this assignment.
thanks to me and my poor understanding plus poor ability to summarise!

i also want to thank rong and jas for helping me decipher what the lecturer wants and also for reading my essay.
THANK YOU SO MUCH GIRLS!

and i realised i'm getting busier and busier each day.
because of this, we only meet up like once a week.
we haven't gone for trips.
we haven't been to movies lately.
we never even have a proper telephone communication.

ARGH...
i miss you so much.
and i can't wait for my birthday to come!

you're my sweet little baby.

2010-09-05T23:46:00.003+08:00

so happy to see the message.
it made me smile.
you make me smile.
i love you.

suddenly, i'm missing you so much again.

your want, my goal.

2010-09-05T00:20:00.002+08:00

i will try to stop asking personal things.
and hope that one day, you will willingly open up to me.

feeling apart is the consequence.
and knowing that one day you'll automatic say is happiness.

first admittance.

2010-09-03T23:19:00.002+08:00

Just came back from KTP Hospital.
Thank you Daddy and Mummy.
Sorry to make you all worry.
I Love You!

it just feels so good to be home.
although the bed there is softer.
ha.
but i never wanna go back there again!
first needle was painful and wrong and not necessary!
doctor ah doctor.
time to practice more pokings.
HAHA!

all the blood test, urine test, x-ray scans are so interesting.
and i never want to do all of those again!
HAHA!

medicine, medicine and more medicine.
hai..
i just hope to recover asap.
we're spending too little time tgt.
it feels kinda like far apart.

it's a friday night and everyone is out/busy..
only me and my medicine and my bed.
ARGH!
hate this.

well, gotta face reality that i'm not in a good condition to go out.
so, be good and eat my medicine and sleep.
night, world!

why am i always so stupid.

2010-08-26T00:16:00.002+08:00

remember there was this one time when i went to try out for the coordinator job?
the so called shun bian "interview" and no pay job?
you told me they were just using me.
and indeed!
they need ppl now and was asking if im still interested.
to think back, i felt so stupid.
should just have listened to you and not waste the cab fare into the venue!

but anyway, not going into it now.
i have more important stuffs.

workloads getting heavier!

My second visit to NLB, first borrow since primary school.

2010-08-24T16:58:00.002+08:00

was at NLB for about 2 hours today.
reading up books on CSR and Toyota for assignment.
lecturer kept emphasizing on reading, reading and reading!
And went down to Bishan Library and borrowed 3 books.
And surprisingly, i'm a member of NLB!!!

i thought my membership was canceled like LONG LONG AGO..
HA!

ok.
Storybook for the week - Harvard Business Review on CSR.
Bedtime Story - The Toyota Way.
Books to read while poo-ing - 10 Co. that put success 2nd and came in 1st.

WOW.
Gonna head down to Lee Kong Chian again this thurs/sat or BOTH!
How hardworking right?
Anyone wanna join?
HAHA!

b..

2010-08-23T17:29:00.003+08:00

baby, don't apologise.
for i want you to love me more instead.
because i have faith.
in you and in us.
and because i trust.
i trust that you will always make me smile.

s95..

2010-08-23T14:55:00.002+08:00

Canon has launched the PowerShot S95 premium compact as successor to the S90.
but not yet in singapore!
i'm eyeing on this.

http://www.dpreview.com/news/1008/10081918canonpowershots95.asp

a big heart or merely dumb..?

2010-08-22T02:18:00.000+08:00

it felt like a pinch.
then a punch.
then it heals slowly.
but i'm glad you told me.
and i trust.

ooooooooo... =D

2010-08-20T01:01:00.003+08:00

calmmmm..

2010-08-13T15:25:00.001+08:00

CONTROL CONTROL..
distract distract...

positive positive positive. i need it.

2010-08-12T19:00:00.003+08:00

i don't like to make sacrifices.
i try to put in effort instead.

and the word is try..

i'm so super tired now.
although i had 10 hours of sleep, i still feel damn tired.
the hours is not the factor for being so tired.
it is the late nights i had that made me so damn freaking tired.
i want to start sleeping early.
seriously...
it's so torturing.

having a class test next week.
AHHH!!!
finance - derivative securities..
so damn hard!
why did i take finance?

and i'm missing you.
so sweet..
the way you pull me close to you in your sleep.
and the best part is that you don't rmb.
oh.....

miss you more.

2010-08-11T10:23:00.003+08:00

I hope to blink blink and 2 days is over!

My baby flies over the ocean.
My baby flies over the sea.
My baby flies over the ocean.
So bring back my baby to me.

you speak with your beautiful eyes.

2010-08-10T21:40:00.003+08:00

you looked so smart.
so good looking!
i just can't control when i saw you..
just can't stop myself from praising you..
ohhhh.
i just can't stop looking at you.

Happy girl..

2010-08-05T16:20:00.003+08:00

time is passing so slowly..
it's only 5th August!!!!!
ARGH..

i know i should be doing my tutorials already.
but..
i just cannot start..
i don't have the mood for it..
ok, i need a study buddy!

i'm so happy!!
the ticket fine is waived!!!
YEAH!!
don't have to spend the unnecessary money for fine..
BROKE!!

and i'm so happy again!!
i saw the rooms!!
they are nice..
toilet is big..
AWWWW!!!
VIEW IS A-W-E-S-O-M-E.......
so gonna have my birthday there!!
thanks to Yun Yun!!!
=D

I am so looking forward to using the pool with you!!!
the stunning view...
W O A H...
can October be tomorrow?

What a bitch!

2010-08-02T13:50:00.002+08:00

I've got a Fucking Bitchy BFF..

[q i r u i] i just need you now. says:
idiot
then pei me go eat la

stephanie says:
wher u wana eat
YES

[q i r u i] i just need you now. says:
our hse there lo

stephanie says:
ASK DE MAGIC QUESTION
u nv end yr qns properly
sth tat starts with P

[q i r u i] i just need you now. says:
PRETTY, SEXY, HOTTIE..... PEI ME GO EAT PUUUUHHHHHH-LEAAAASSSEEEEEE...

Anantara Kihavah Maldives Resort & Spa

2010-08-02T13:34:00.002+08:00

The morning sun dappling the crystal-clear waters of a secluded lagoon. Afternoons spent sunbathing by your private infinity pool, just steps from the ocean. An evening stroll across soft white beaches, the moonlight casting shadows on the sand. Nights spent dreaming to the sound of the waves in an overwater villa. Imagine life on a luxurious deserted island - an island of swaying palm trees and unending horizons of blue.

OMG!! This is like heaven!
I'm definitely gonna visit this place within the next 5 years!!
It's so awesome!!!!
and beyond description!!

Marina Bay Sands SkyPark Pool

2010-08-01T16:19:00.010+08:00

Imagine swimming in the clouds, overlooking Singapore's skyline. At 200m in the sky, the 150m swimming pool is the world’s largest infinity & outdoor pool at that height.

I'm so tempted to hold my birthday here!!
If only i can get the staff discount, i'll definitely decide on the spot and make payment!
OH MY GOD!
I so want to visit the pool!!
the first time i'm so enthusiastic about a place in Singapore!
PS: Usually i'm anti-Singapore.
HA!

And and and..
i think i'm gonna get the iphone4!
i will get it once my friend says "actually reception is ok in Singapore".
=D

Ok.
Time to save some MONIEEEESSSS....
ARGH!

Consequences of a Choco Lover.

2010-07-31T21:28:00.003+08:00

am having a sore throat now.
thanks to Ben & Jerry's - Chocolate Fudge Brownie and ROYCE choc.
Body temperature is rising...

I hope i don't fall sick.
PLEASE.
I swear to eat lesser like REALLY LESSER!

ROYCE Champagne LOVE.

2010-07-30T22:09:00.001+08:00

I can never resist this.
Forever in love with this.
OH GOD!!
i just can't live without this!!!
it's L O V E...

True.

2010-07-30T12:38:00.002+08:00

Promises never work.
Compromises do.
So, i never make promises unless i'm 100% sure it works.

OR......
I make promises when i'm out to lie.

BUT.....
I'm too in love with you to be lying.
I'm true.

Truly Madly Deeply In Love With You.

2010-07-29T15:00:00.002+08:00

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need.
I'll love you more with every breath
Truly madly deeply do...

Be My Baby

2010-07-28T17:10:00.006+08:00

Be My Baby

I'll make you happy, baby
Just wait and see
For every kiss you give me, I'll give you three
Oh, since the day I saw you, I have been waiting for you
You know I will adore you, Till eternity

You're so cute. I cannot take it!

2010-07-28T13:00:00.003+08:00

*Alarm rings*
B still half asleep..

Me: B..
B: I don't understand the beat.
Me: *Confused* What beat!? HUH!?
B: The marching.
Me: Huh!? What marching, what beat?! HAHA!

After B is awake..
B: It feels like i talked alot.

HAHAHAHAHA!!!
You are just so adorable!
I cannot take it!!!!
=D

nice.

2010-07-27T00:22:00.000+08:00

You lift my feet off the ground
Spin me around
You make me crazier, crazier

Feels like I'm falling and I
I'm lost in your eyes
You make me crazier,
Crazier, crazier

my cutey pie.

2010-07-26T20:55:00.002+08:00

the hugs,
the strokes,
up and down the back..

with you lying in my arms,
saying things you don't know,
and falling asleep..

you are just so cute, so loveable.

i'm just too happy.. to be true..

2010-07-24T16:41:00.001+08:00

Every time you walk away, you take a piece of me with you...
i'm loving you.

lots of misses, baby.

2010-07-17T18:12:00.003+08:00

sometimes when i miss you.
i don't dare to say.
because u'll be busy..
and i don't want to disturb you.

but sometimes i'll tell you.
and i'll be very happy.
because you are missing me too.

stupid move.

2010-07-16T00:09:00.001+08:00

Oh shit.
Fuck!

and now i know why..
damn..

baby.

2010-07-12T23:55:00.002+08:00

it's you i wanted.
the feelings that i once curbed.
but everything changed.
and the feeling is beyond description.

when your smell lingers.
your touch so tender.
and the whisper so gentle.
it leaves me full of misses.

so, shut up.

2010-06-28T20:55:00.001+08:00

Forever is not a lie.
Cause Forever isn't a description of time.
It's a description of a heart.

When the heart dies.
Forever fades away.

i think too much..

2010-06-28T17:01:00.004+08:00

i thought..
maybe you were ready to be friends.
well, i guess not..

i won't and will never talk again..
ha.
guess i'm just too fast..
the love just ain't enough.
what to do?

good luck..
bababababababababahahahahahahhaahah...

i just can't wait!!!!
1) School to start
2) After NDP
3) MY BIRTHDAY

oooooOOOOoooOOOooooOOoOooo~~~~

HEHEHE...
=DD

PPT..

2010-06-28T12:54:00.001+08:00

Based PSYCHOLOGY PERSONALITY TEST,
You’re a stubborn sweetheart... You “love” him only because he loves you. If his flame puts out, you let go with no trouble.
You’re undoubtedly good-natured! Most of the time, people are confident to approach you because they know you will consider them.

Here is the analysis: ...
웃 : You love the crowd... a party animal!
웃 : You hide your emotions... Sometimes pretending to be always happy.
웃 : You search for love...
웃 : You have so many ideas in mind... You’re creative and aggressive!
웃 : You’re independent!

Hmmmm...
No comments..

the love we once had.

2010-06-25T15:10:00.001+08:00

you were my best bf.
and i'm happy that i once have it.
and i'm sorry for not being able to be your best.

thank you..

are you?

2010-06-19T01:51:00.000+08:00

looking forward to tml.
=DD

can i do it?

2010-06-14T03:46:00.000+08:00

curbing...
feeling..
stopping..

but trying to let loose..

single-ling

2010-06-10T23:32:00.003+08:00

been long since i updated my blog.
nothing much is happening.
just that i realised how much i have lost.
the fun, the late nights, the catching up and so much more..

it's another lesson learnt.

anyway, CONGRATULATIONS TO YOUR BABY GIRL!!!!
awwww...
so happy for the both of you.
really happy..
i believe u will be a good father..
who dotes on you beloved daughter.
HA.

i know that many won't believe how someone who were once tgt could become friends after they break up.
to be honest, it's not easy..
but once you get over it, the pure friendship that stays is the best feeling ever.
so, all the best, jon!
*babies are hard to handle!*

2 months plus have passed.
there are times when i think back of the past.
there are times when i hate those past.
there are times when i love the past.
it's kind of like a mixture you know.

hmmmm.
it's actually kinda hard for us to be friends in the near future.
or maybe there won't even be a chance.
whatever it is, take care, my friend.
=)

Start learning to accept.

2010-05-22T16:24:00.001+08:00

Whatever u wanna fix in someone else is a reflection of a part of u that can't accept them for who they are.

thanks dear girls and boys!

2010-05-19T14:11:00.002+08:00

thanks dear girls and boys for all the love, care and concern you all have given me..
i really love you people!

once again, thank you.
i grew stronger because i have you people by my side, always there for me..
i just feel so fortunate..

LOTS OF SINCERE LOVE,
FROM RUI.

stop the late nights.

2010-05-18T23:44:00.003+08:00

been having late nights recently.
and i have to stop this!!!!

i don't mind staying up late when i'm in Hong Kong!!
but not in s'pore..
so boring!!

schedule's packed for hong kong.
hope i have things to buy..
not like in taiwan...
ahhhhh!!

i wanna learn cantonese!!!
=DDD
prepare for hong kong.
hahaha..

i just can't believe my eyes.
oh my god..

不要乱说

2010-05-14T17:20:00.003+08:00

离开你我承认有点寂寞
但其实我一点也不觉得难过
任何决定没有谁对谁错
但你的无知是无可救药的错

离开你不会是一种噱头
我只是要一点呵护还嫌太多
任何结果没有谁有把握
但请你让一条路让大家好走
谢谢你谢谢你

让我看清楚世界冷漠
爱又怎样又怎样
大门就在你背後
你不懂就不要乱说
看你不懂就不要乱说
你已经犯了多少的大过
你不懂就不要乱说
我想要飞
你不懂就保持沈默
你总是离奇失踪突然回头
就让一切是个错
我要离开这个噩梦
你不懂就不要乱说
你不懂你不懂不懂

hot hot hot..

2010-05-08T19:32:00.002+08:00

why why why is the weather so hot these days?!?!?
argh!!!!
cannot stand it, seriously!!!

but the jokes cooled me down..
HAHA.
funny funny.
oh my god!!

argh!!! why am i so tired!!

2010-05-06T13:37:00.003+08:00

Because i only had 4 hours of sleep.
LOL!
Damn the free entry and free flow!!
Phuture on wednesday suck!

Ok, from today onwards i want to stop using short forms unless necessary!

Try this!

2010-05-05T12:45:00.010+08:00

JANELLE - 1 1 5 5 3 3 5
Add all up = 2 3
Add up again till you reach a single digit = 5

Meaning and Characteristics

1 - Competitive - a leader, independent, strength, creative and original
2 - Diplomatic - friendly, tactful, peaceful, gentle and sensitive
3 - Optimistic - Easygoing, sociable, spontaneous and humorous
4 - Traditionalist - Determined, reliable, conservative, activist and organised
5 - Creative - Free spirited, artistic, enquiring, innovative and influential
6 - Contributor - Responsible, careful, conventional and reliable
7 - Inventive - Imaginative, resourceful, eccentric, quiet and thoughtful
8 - Organizer - Leadership skills, planner, strong, high achiever and sound judgment
9 - Humanitarian - Compassionate, caring, charitable and civilised

a month.

2010-05-04T12:38:00.002+08:00

soon it will be a month.
and now, i would say that it's impossible.
move on and be happy.
*** can.

change for the better.
learn the mistakes.
time is the factor.

life's been good. hope for the better.

2010-05-03T15:05:00.003+08:00

so many things have happened after the break up.

and i like it.

a carefree life..

always hoping for it.

and another thing that keeps me looking forward to..

HONG KONG TRIP!!!!!!!!

WOOOO HOOOOO~~~~~~!!!

i'm getting so excited already!

love me, let me go.

2010-04-29T11:26:00.002+08:00

let the past stay as good memories.

don't force them again.

let them go.

if you want to force things, everything will be different.

nothing will be like the past.

i will take you for granted.

i will flare as and when i like.

it's obvious to us that the way we show love, care and concern for each other is not the way we expect.

please don't force things, it will turn out to be unhappy.

do you want this?

don't believe that it won't be this way.

i tell you, it will.

it's not even a month yet.

the time that has passed is not enough to heal.

please stand strong.

i know you can.

where are your pride!??!?!

find somebody else who can treat you the way you want them to.

you deserve better..

let me go.

i'm sorry for asking too much.

2010-04-27T17:13:00.005+08:00

please take ur medicine.

please have food.

please go and buy and if u cant, please get ur friends for help.

i hope that u can recover soon.

and please take care of yourself.

i dont know what has happened to you.

and it seems tt u wouldn't want to say.

so i wont ask.

i wont say.

i wont talk to you again.

my talking seems to be hurting you even more.

and please, do not see my blog again.

if it's too hurting for you, then dont come step into shit.

i'm just not good enough, not worthy of your love.

bye..

pleaseeeeee

2010-04-26T00:54:00.001+08:00

i declare that i am allergic to alcohol.
rashes appear the next day immediately.
can it be trained?
haha.
i love white wine.

everything's ended.
a new life, a new start, a new chapter.
can't wait to go to school!!!
and grad in australia!!!

PRAY....

this much..

2010-04-23T17:17:00.000+08:00

Good memories will remain forever.
Bad memories shall be FLUSHED AWAY!!!

=D
Goodbye my love.
I once loved you very much..
how much?
THIS MUCH............

沒那麼簡單

2010-04-22T23:30:00.002+08:00

沒那麼簡單就能找到聊得來的伴

沒那麼簡單就能去愛別的全不看

不愛孤單一久也習慣
不用擔心誰也不用被誰管

感覺快樂就忙東忙西
感覺累了就放空自己
別人說的話隨便聽一聽自己作決定
不想擁有太多情緒
一杯紅酒配電影
在周末晚上關上了手機舒服窩在沙發裡

相愛沒有那麼容易每個人有他的脾氣
過了愛作夢的年紀轟轟烈烈不如平靜
幸福沒有那麼容易才會特別讓人著迷
什麼都不懂的年紀
曾經最掏心所以最開心曾經

想念最傷心但卻最動心的記憶

dilemma

2010-04-19T15:00:00.003+08:00

am at the shop now..

have to come here for a month because i promised my mother in return for a hongkong trip in may.

im having so many dilemmas these few days.

been thinking of studying overseas.

but so many constraining factors.

1) Money

It's every kids problem, other than bai jia zi.

Course fees ranging from SGD 45000 to SGD 65000 not inclusive of living expenses!

2) Parent's brain

Dad says if you study overseas means you are lousy.

he doesn't know the ranking and whatsoever.

how to talk!?!?

3) Time

I'm so running out of time.

the next intake is in july.

application must be submitted end april or mid may.

then if i rush, i will fly off in july.

where to get money?

how to persuade the stupid brain??

DAMN!!!

WHAT SHOULD I DO!!!

a strong front.

2010-04-16T23:54:00.002+08:00

many things have been happening in this month.
just in a month, so much has happened..

the break up is a blow.

after i quit my job, i cannot continue my father's work because i'm affected by the break up.
then my sister is one irritating ass.
she asked me to quit my job and help dad.
then i did.
when i'm here, she told my mother i duno what i want.
then she keep saying: i think you go out and find a job.
for what reason u know?
just because today i go to shop with a very sian face.
hello! i didn't have enough sleep and even went down to the shop despite being so tired u know?
i can just be very irresponsible and not go down to the shop.
u know i'm freaking pissed??!
u know it's very terrible for me?

because of the studies, my dad is nagging.
meanwhile he's asking me over to the shop to work.
i fucking duno what they want!
i'm really feeling very shitty now.
all i need is someone to talk to but apparently i dun feel like finding anyone.
nobody but you..

seriously, im starting to think again.
should i borrow money from my parents to study overseas this august or should i just go out to work now.
i'm getting irritated by my sister's FUCKING temper.
dont know how can her husband stand her..
she's even weirder when she is pregnant.
and it's super annoying!

I'm looking all the time..

better.. better..

2010-04-14T16:17:00.001+08:00

Life is getting better..
crying getting lesser..

hope i can go to Hong Kong in May!!!!
***PRAY***

been looking at all the photos in the room..
always tend to smile at them..
smiling stupidly..
hahaha..

anyway, i believe my single life will not end so soon..
wana take a break away from being attached..

better..

2010-04-13T17:55:00.000+08:00

life's much better after that phone call that day.
was really damn pissed..
i was affirmed that leaving was the right choice.

like what someone said.
time will heal.
only good memories will stay.
a better one waiting out there.

been thinking of going overseas for my studies.
maybe i can get an ang moh bf!!
=D
lol.
then stay there forever..
been thinking forever.
haha.

i duno if my msg has been passed across.
but i just want to say don't sign.
there are many many other opportunities out there.
gamble on those opportunities and strike it rich!!
=D

take care..

if meant

2010-04-12T12:35:00.002+08:00

it was a very confusing day ystd.
thinking of things randomly and messily.

really damn tiring.
even after a break up, we can still quarrel on the phone.
what is that?

seriously, just not meant for each other.

i shouldn't hope for anything more.
stop hoping, stop thinking.
stop stop.
stop.

weather's been hot this few days.
drink more water alright.
LOM.

R

2010-04-11T18:09:00.002+08:00

went on cruise from fri to sat.
it was ok.
nothing very interesting.
cause i dun go to casino.
ha.

everyday eat eat eat.
breakfast, lunch, dinner, supper.
for both days.
FAT!

we visited Redang Island.
It was SO SO SO SO SO beautiful!!!
i was so excited.
i was so tempted to dive.
but 2 dives cost $155.
Might as well go with diving centres.

it was good enough for to to be able to play in the seawater and do some tanning.

lots of memories flushed.
the wish you were there mood.

"How are you now?"

on the cruise we swim, jacuzzi and plaed the slide.
it was so fun!
the slide had a part where it's totally transparent and you can totally see the BLUE SEA.
so scary!!
like i'm falling into the sea.
HAHAHA!!!

i had to remove R cause cannot slide with it.
so afraid it would fall out of my hands.
so afraid it would go missing.

i think im falling sick.
not enough water, not enough sleep.
super duper tired...

06042010

2010-04-08T13:36:00.002+08:00

it's the time.
06042010.

always wondering WAY.
always looking WAY.
always thinking WAY.
there are no changes.
there are no sounds.

SILENCE.
DROPS.

always TOY.
HARD.

long, late nights.

2010-01-08T02:11:00.002+08:00

every night seemed long.
every night goes late.
the tears that brave through the day came rolling down at night.

but i know it's not the most hurting thing, because at least you are still on earth.
i still gotta be strong.
i still needa move on.
memories should be well kept.
and yes, they are.

it just takes time to heal.

the last peck

2010-01-07T12:10:00.002+08:00

it all started from a message.
and it leads on to "why you like that"
and i realise it's just you asking because you have nothing to do.
so it's our r/s a game for you?
a nothing to do, just say only attitude?

i understand my fault for pissing you off in FB.
i know i shouldnt have.
and im sorry.
but are you even sorry for saying the above?
have you even thought of apologising?

after the talk, you said that i should grow up, i should learn not to argue when listening, i should not assume.
but what have you realised from the talk?
ok, i know what.
you realised that i'm childish, i'm not listening, i likes to assume and that i'm sorry.
do you see the point of talking?
you only realised things of me, me and more me.
what about you?
what about yourself?

do you dare say you aren't childish at all?
do you dare say you listened?
do you dare say you realised anything?
do you dare say you don't assume things?

i dont know how this r/s could continue when you see everything as my fault.
everything must be done by me.

after the talk you msged me.
you ask me what have we talked?
what are we?
and that you don't see anything done to mae this r/s work.
but have you ever thought of what you have done?
and why did you ask me up when you think that we haven even talked?

then when i send you the 5 page long msg saying that i'm tired.
your reply was quick, obviously not thinking.
you told me i have my freedom.
you assumed i said break up, when what i only want is you to try and understand what the msg was other than defending myself.

ok, enough saying.
i guess we are just not suitable.

Gossips..

2009-07-31T14:37:00.000+08:00

Today's ride home was such a juicy one.
Although the topics are not at all related to me.
But i just find it funny.

First, girl A and B was sitting behind me on the bus.
I overheard their gossips.
They were talking about another girl who wears very short skirts, huge and loose shirts.
Talking about how she reveals her "inner meat" to others.
So funny.

Next, girl C and D came up the bus and took over that seat behind me.
They were also gossiping.
Talking about which girlfriends they like and dislike, bla bla bla.

So i was wondering.
Is it true that when 2 people come together, they will tend to start gossiping?
Hmm.
Or does this principle only applies to girls.
(FYI, both situations are girl and girl)

I thought back and find this theory kind of true.
When I am with a girl friend, we would gossip.
Even though it's only one sentence or one topic or on one person.
So funny.
Human can't live without gossips?

OH, I JUST LOVED THIS!!!

2009-07-30T22:35:00.000+08:00

I so want to buy this camera!!!!

Initially was this..
http://uniqjapan.com/images/bigwhite.jpg

Then i saw this!!! (The white one)
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_lR6jrhLbPuU/Sc_uhHfb4tI/AAAAAAAADm4/aOEbN-kSRC0/s400/yone-fujifilm-instax-mini-cheki-25-camera-1.jpg

Oh my god!!!!!

Wait for me!!

When i told mum i wanted this, she said it's not practical.
The film is very expensive.
One picture one dollar.
No use.
She said that i haven't started earning money that's why i keep wasting money.

I think she doesn't understand me.
I don't mind using my own money.
The most i just eat lesser, spend lesser.
I can don't buy anything else.
But i just want this camera!
I have been wanting this for very long already!

You only live once in your lifetime.
When is the other lifetime for you to do everything you want again?
And plus this camera is only $150.
I don't have to buy films everyday right?
Only when i want to take photos right?

Since she says it's not practical then why bother buying new phones for my sisters and brothers when their old one is still in working condition?
It's also not practical what.
The function of a phone is to call, talk, message, taking pictures and listening to music.
The old phone can do it, why buy a new one.

And i'm not buying a new one here.
I'm buying my FIRST one here!
I have already gave up the overseas studies because she said it wasn't practical.
I'm not gonna give up anything since that happened!

just sad to know.

2009-07-29T00:00:00.000+08:00

well, maybe calling up to ask was a wrong decision in the first place.

steph told me something that i thought was very true.
she said: you will even bother to make a call to ask his opinion already means that you care about what he thinks, it means that you find his answers important.

well, guess it was just wrong right from the start to make the call.

The trip in Sept!

2009-07-26T23:41:00.000+08:00

Been planning on a trip to Redang for about a month already.
Just can't wait for that month to arrive!!!

After looking through so many resorts they have on the island, i think we will stay at Laguna.
The pictures online looked good!!!!

http://img301.imageshack.us/img301/363/p2220098dj8.jpg

The sea there is CLEAR BLUE!!!!!!
ARGH!!! So tempted!!!
Hope i can fly there like tml..
HAHAHAHA!!

Darling, I'm so so so so happy!

Beaches I MUST visit before i die..

2009-07-21T15:06:00.001+08:00

Tahiti
Bora Bora
Madives

bored and found!!

2009-07-20T01:14:00.001+08:00

Below is the address for sleeping positions and their meanings.

http://jercasas2.tripod.com/Sleeping_positions.htm##8

and so, i happen to be this..

SIDE SLEEPER WITH ONE KNEE BENDED

You are inclined to be fussy , always whining and complaining . Nervousness is probably your second name . You tense up easily and get overly excited over small matters. Life isn't such a big deal . Learn to relax .

is that true??
oh my...

I love my life.

2009-06-29T02:47:00.002+08:00

Life's great!

time with bf even on weekdays..
caught up with friends..
happy happy all day long..

BUT!!!
school's starting next thurs!!!
*THUNDER*

my brain stopped working since end of Feb when exams ended.
and now, it has to start again.
poor little thing..

BUSY!

with you

2009-06-11T04:03:00.001+08:00

I wanna go Korea!!!
I wanna eat bim bap rice.
I wanna eat rice cakes.
I wanna eat bbq meat.
I wanna wanna wanna wanna go KOREA!!!!!

Overseas..

2009-06-04T16:35:00.000+08:00

Off to Shanghai!!!!

I'm a good girl..

2009-06-04T15:30:00.002+08:00

I lost my wallet ystd..
shocked to the extent that i feel numb..
I couldn't cry even though i wanted to..

then when i met with you..
i felt safe and secured in your arms..
how i wish you were there when i lose it..

i'm sorry for whatever has happened in the past few weeks..
it wasn't on purpose.
it wasn't intentional.
it just happened.
another obstacle for us to overcome.

i hope when i get back things would be much better.
and all i want to say is i'm sorry.

and also, thanks eugene for helping me search for my wallet ystd.
XIE XIE NI!! I'M NICE AND SO ARE YOU!! =D
don't worry, i will tell yue your good behaviour.
HAHAA..

I love you darling, miss you loads.

Dive, hand in hand.

2009-06-03T03:27:00.001+08:00

我要和你一起完成我们的梦想。

promises.

2009-06-01T16:15:00.000+08:00

it's the down period again.
and it's because of me and the issues.
i will do whatever i promised.
and i will prove to you.

because i love you.

the best phrase in life.

2009-05-24T00:40:00.002+08:00

there is this.
then there is that..

but why don't i?

i chose to close one eye.
w.y.d.k.w.h.y.

and sometimes i just wishes to close both eyes.

All i want to say to you..

2009-05-21T03:10:00.002+08:00

我很爱你, 因为;

我开心的时候, 你会陪我一起笑.
我伤心的时候, 你会安慰我.
我哭的时候, 你会逗我笑.

这点点滴滴, 让我很快乐, 很幸福.

Thank God I Found You.

A Slack Life

2009-04-28T21:57:00.002+08:00

Been slacking for a few months already..
not exactly a few but maybe about 2 months?
it's like going back to being 5 years old again..
which meant that i dun have to worry about work or school..
all that i have to think about is money and money..
why?
because i go out almost everyday!!!

anyway, dar is out at sea for night diving since sunday..
and it's tuesday today..
how time flies!!
it's wednesday tml!!
and so ystd, he ran back into his bunk and took his phone just to call me..
wow...
how sweet is that..
hahaha..

i was so happy to hear his call..
although i know he will be back on wed..
and oh ya!
thurs is his pass out parade..
can't wait to attend and look out for handsome cum fit cum tanned guys!!
WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA..
joking la..

anyway, i know it's been long since i update my blog.
firstly, it's because i'm just too lazy.
secondly, when i use my com, it means that i'm watching shows..
so no time for blogging..
Lastly, i lost interest in blogging..
BECAUSE I'M NOT SAD!! And that my honeymoon period is coming back again..
=D

And to update on my life..
i attended one of my friend's wedding..
So happy for her..
CONGRATULATIONS!!!
Hope she gives birth to a cute and healthy baby!!
=D

ok, next up..
i miss STEPHANIE LEE SOO PENG SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
please read my blog...
if not i'm saying this for nothing..
hahahahahaha...
really wish to see you soon..
like blink blink and you appear..
hahahaha..
forget to pass you the things we got for you from Taiwan!!
oh my..
better not let yue see this..
else she's gonna nag at me again!!
hahahaha..
I'M SO LOOKING FORWARD!!!!!
loveeeeeeeeeeeee.. Shhhhhhhhhhh...
it's our secret...

and lastly, i'm going facial tml..
can't wait for thurs to come real soon!!!
i miss you loads darling..